All Wrapped up into Me

Loneliness Isn’t it amazing how you can be surrounded by people and still feel utterly and completely alone? You can still feel isolated and completely withdrawn, outcast as if you no longer belong. There is no crowd of people that fit inside your new world. Emptiness the feeling of emptiness forever wavering within you like a constant piercing in your heart while your heart is trying to re heal you're trying to exist but the emptiness and the loneliness fight for its place in your existence.

Trauma the trauma that damages every part of you without even realizing you began to fear everything yet nothing at all. When you don’t get that phone call or that text message, or there have been weeks since you heard from your family or friends you fear the worse. You fear the worse because you know the worst is not far. You know the worst is obtainable you have felt its grip and you know it can happen.

Isolation you tell yourself no one understands me, everyone is tired of me, everyone looks at me differently because I loss my baby, I am boring because no one can relate, eventually they will run away because the cross I carry is too heavy to bear.

Suffocation you feel like you’re constantly suffocating and trying desperately to grasp for air. You see the sky you feel the wind, but the air is too far away, your trying as hard as you can to just breathe but the suffocation won't accept the air that comes in.

Sadness the sadness that lingers around hindering you from enjoying anything other than loss. The sadness that’s sharpening that keep you living in yesteryear