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How many Children do you have?

Updated: Jan 26, 2019

The one question every grieving woman dreads. How many children do you have?


The question for me is not the worst, for me it's explaining I have 3 boys and a girl. It's almost impossible to inform someone how many kids you have without actually informing them of their ages.

I always say she is 88 days old, which opens the dialog: "Oh wow you just had a baby," then there is that awkward moment where you are forced to make the decision. "Should I tell the she passed at 88 days old, or lead them to to assume I have a 3 month old at home." Am I ready for this dialog? Am I ready for them to look at me different? Am I ready for what comes next. She cant possibly stay 88 days old forever, although to me she is but at one point they will definetely expect an update. It becomes a matter of should I explain now or later? Strangely enough it's uncomfortable to be around people that know , but when your having to start over in a new area and your thinking finally; I'm not known as the woman that loss her baby it happens. I cant ignore her existence to avoid being uncomfortable. At what pointare you ever ok with saying, "My daughter is in heaven." How can something so comforting to me make others so uncomfortable.


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